A PARADOY OF "TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS"
'TWAS ALL HALLOW'S EVE, THE COSTUMES WERE HUNG, THE CHIDLREN WERE NESTLED ALL SNUG IN THEIR CRYPT, WHEN OUT IN THE GRAVEYARD AROSE SUCH A CLATTER, THE MOON ON THE BREAST OF THE NEW FALLEN LEAVES WITH A LOOMING DARK DRIVER, SO LETHAL AND GRIM, "NOW SLASHER! NOW LANCER! NOW BUNDY! AND HEXIN'! AS WTICHES ON BROOMS IN THE NIGHT FLY, AND THEN IN A TWINKLIN, I HEARD ON THE ROOF, HE WAS DRESSED ALL IN BLACK, FROM HIS HEAD TO HIS FOOT, HIS EYES - HOW THEY GLEAMED! HIS GLARE - HOW SCARY! HE TOOK OFF HIS PACK, RIPPED IT OPEN WITH WHITE FANGS. HE SPOKE NOT A WORD, BUT WENT STRAIGHT TO HIS WORK. SAM SPRANG TO HIS HEARSE, AND BECKONED TO HIS TEAM. HE LURCHED IN TO THE HEARSE, INTO THE DRIVER'S SEAT, "HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ALL,
BY CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE (1779 - 1863)
AND ALL THROUGH THE HOUSE,
ALL CREATURES WERE STIRRING,
EVEN THE MOUSE
IN THE CLOSET WITH CARE
IN HOPES THAT COME MORNING,
THEY ALL STILL WOULD BE THERE.
WHILE INTO DEEP SLUMBER THEY HAPPILY SLIPPED.
WITH MAMMA IN HER CAPE, AND I IN MY CAP,
WE HAD JUST SETTLED DOWN FOR A LONG AUTUMN'S NAP.
I SPRANG OUT OF MY COFFIN TO SEE WHAT WAS THE MATTER.
AWAY TO THE WINDOW I FLEW LIKE A FLASH,
TORE DOWN THE COBWEBS, AND OPENED THE LATCH.
GAVE AN EERIE GLOW TO THE BATS IN THE EAVES.
WHEN, WHAT TO MY FIVE GLOWING EYES SHOULD APPEAR,
BUT A FLYING BLACK HEARSE AND EIGHT GHOSTS WITH A LEER.
i KNEW WITHOUT DOUBT THAT IT JUST MIGHT BE HIM.
MORE RAPID THAN BULLETS, HIS COURSERS THEY CAME,
AND HE SHREIKED, AND HE SHOUTED, AND CALLED THEM BY NAME.
ON VOMIT! ON STOOPID! ON REAPER! AND VEXIN'!
TO THE TOP OF THE TOMG, AND PAST THE BRICK WALL,
NOW FLY AWAY! FLY AWAY! FLY AWAY ALL!"
WHEN THEY MEET WITH AN OBSTACLE, MOUNT TO THE SKY,
SO UP TO THE TOMP TOP, THE COURSERS THEY FLEW,
WITH THE HEARSE FULL OF "GIFTS", AND THE DRIVER, SAM HAIN.
THE STAMPING OF FEET IN A MANNER UNCOUTH.
AS I DREW IN MY CLAWS, AND WAS TURNING AROUND,
CRASHING THROUGHT THE CEILING SAM HAIN CAME WITH A BOUND.
AND HIS HOCKEY MASK WAS ALL TARNISHED AND COVERED IN SOOT.
A BUNDLE OF SORTS HE HAD STRAPPED TO HIS BACK,
AND HE LOOKED LIKE A DEOM JUST HOLDING HIS PACK!
HIS HANDS JUST LIKE TALONS, HIS ARMS GREEN AND HAIRY.
HIS LARGE, DROOLING MOUTH WAS DRAWN BACK IN A GROWL,
AND HIS WHOLE STANCE GAVE OFF THE LOOK OF A SCOWL.
HE THEN DROPPED THE BAG, IT HIT THE FLOOR WITH A BANG.
HE SAW ME THEN, AND REARED HIS FEARSOME HEAD,
THE LOOK IN HIS EYES FILLED ME WITH DREAD.
HIS PACK SPILLED MAGGOTS ON MY FLOOR - WHAT A JERK!
AND STICKING HIS FINGER UP INTO HIS NOSE,
AND GIVING A NOD, BACK THROUGHT THE CEILING HE ROSE.
HE BELLOWED, "WHEN THEY SEE THOSE MAGGOTS, THEY'LL SCREAM!"
I PICKED THROUGH THE LARVAE, TO THE WINDOW SCENE,
AND THAT'S WHEN I FIGURED - "THIS HAIN GUY'S JUST MEAN!"
AND THE CAR HIT THE SKIES, PULLED BY THE GRUESOME FLLET.
THEN I HEARD HIM EXCLAIM, AS HE BLASTED OUT OF SIGHT,
AND TO ALL A GHOULISH NIGHT"